


Not Your Cup of Coffee

by MiniRaven



Category: Marvel Cinematic Universe, The Avengers (Marvel Movies), The Avengers (Marvel) - All Media Types
Genre: Awkward Steve Rogers, Coffee, Coffee Addict Tony Stark, Domestic Avengers, Domestic Fluff, Gen, Idiots in Love, One Shot, POV Steve Rogers, Pranks and Practical Jokes, Protective Steve Rogers
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-02-08
Updated: 2020-02-08
Packaged: 2021-02-25 07:48:57
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,046
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/22492570
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/MiniRaven/pseuds/MiniRaven
Summary: As a prank, the team switches Tony's black coffee out with more... creative options. Nobody gets hurt and it's all in good fun, but some people go harder than others.
Relationships: Steve Rogers & Tony Stark, Steve Rogers/Tony Stark
Comments: 21
Kudos: 301
Collections: POTS (18+) Stony Stocking 2019





	Not Your Cup of Coffee

**Author's Note:**

  * For [ABrighterDarkness](https://archiveofourown.org/users/ABrighterDarkness/gifts).
  * In response to a prompt by [ABrighterDarkness](https://archiveofourown.org/users/ABrighterDarkness/pseuds/ABrighterDarkness) in the [stony_stocking_2019](https://archiveofourown.org/collections/stony_stocking_2019) collection. 



> For the prompt "Tony and coffee" with "pranks" to keep things interesting. Not betaed. All mistakes are my own.
> 
> Hope you enjoy.

There were many rules in Avengers Tower. Rules to keep everyone happy and help things run smoothly. However, these rules were frequently broken or bent depending on the needs of the team. But there was one rule that was absolute:

Never mess with Tony’s coffee.

And everyone abided by that rule. Except in the morning. And only because it was funny.

* * *

It all started when Tony accidentally took Clint’s five sugar coffee concoction instead of his normal black with a splash of milk. He’d shuffled into the kitchen as usual, and grabbed the nearest cup of coffee off the kitchen counter. Normally his cup was a few inches from the edge, but Sam and Clint were having an early morning argument and Clint’s cup got switched with Tony’s. Tony, in his sleep addled state, grabbed Clint’s mug, took a sip, licked his lips, shrugged, and then shuffled back out of the kitchen like nothing was wrong.

Clint noticed immediately and, being the mature man child that he was, he couldn’t leave things there. Tony just walked off with his morning Joe! Revenge was the only logical option.

Cue the next day when Clint swapped Tony’s morning coffee with a frothy caramel Frappuccino. Steve said Tony would never fall for such an obvious prank, Sam bet ten dollars that Tony would, and Natasha just sat on the sidelines, eager to watch the fallout over her breakfast.

Right on schedule, Tony shuffled into the kitchen and grabbed the nearest cup of coffee. Everyone watched on baited breath as Tony took a sip, licked off the whipped cream mustache, hummed, and then walked out of the kitchen none the wiser.

Everyone in the kitchen lost their minds. And thus began the benign bet of who could give Tony the weirdest morning coffee before he noticed.

Nothing malicious, mind you. Tony’s morning drinks were still consumable and they all had caffeine in them. It’s just that sometimes Tony’s black coffee became a sakura late a la Sam Wilson, or a vodka shot with a side of coffee courtesy of one red headed spy. Clint tried to get Peter in on the joke just for fun, but the kid was too much of a good boy to willingly participate in their shenanigans. Steve, on the other hand, lasted about a week before he joined in.

He tried to hold out. He really did. But when Clint filled Tony’s mug up with 10 ounces of full strength Italian espresso, Steve threw his hat in the ring in if only to offer Tony some relief from the team’s daily torment. At least, that’s what he told himself at first.

Clint, Sam, and Natasha were all so focused on finding the strangest thing they could get Tony to drink that they never thought about what Tony would enjoy. They never considered compatible flavors or techniques. They just went with what sounded funny. Which, as Steve found out as he dove into the world of coffee, was a travesty.

There were so many options to consider: Spanish beans, Italian beans, Brazilian beans, Chinese beans, even fair trade beans were in a world of their own. He experimented with grind sizes, strong verses sweet, rich versus weak, press versus drip, boiling water versus slightly above room temp water. His normally sparse room turned into a tiny coffee lab and Steve couldn’t find the energy to care. Not when he got the chance to see Tony’s eyes sparkle every time the genius took a sip of Steve’s heavily research coffee. Yes, Steve was putting an excessive amount of work into a dumb prank, but it still made his day whenever Tony let out a contended hum as Steve’s labor intensive coffee washed over his tongue.

It was a small but sweet gesture, and for a short time, it made Steve feel special.

So when Tony finally found out about the prank, Steve was more than a little disappointed.

* * *

It was a day like any other. Steve caught Tony rummaging around in the team’s coffee cupboard looking for his three o’clock pick me up. Steve didn’t think much of it at first, this stuff just kinda happened, but when Tony turned around and asked Steve, “What’s the one that tastes like blueberries?” Steve’s blood froze.

“Excuse me?” asked Steve, a mix of surprise and terror sending his voice up a few octaves.

“The coffee you made for me, what was it, two maybe three weeks ago?” Tony said, digging around the cupboard as if looking for buried treasure. “It tasted like blueberries and I wanted to show it off to some big wigs I need to impress.”

“It’s… in my room,” said Steve, still a little shaken that the jig was up. “I don’t trust the team not to mess with my beans and… how… do you know about that?”

“About what?” asked Tony.

“Me… I mean, us. Switching your coffee.”

Tony shrugged. “I mean, it was kinda obvious. You guys weren’t particularly subtle about putting half a can of canned whipped cream over slightly caffeinated hot chocolate.”

“But you never said anything.”

“Never felt the need,” said Tony. “It’s early and you guys didn’t try to poison me like Dum-E. Besides, it’s fun trying new things. Clint’s choices can be a bit hit or miss, but I don’t mind. It’s why I keep a stash of my usual in the lab.”

“And, like, you know,” Tony said as he fiddled with an empty coffee mug. “You make really good coffee and I didn’t want you to stop.”

“Oh,” said Steve, trying to hide a blush of embarrassment. He hadn’t expected Tony to consciously notice a difference in quality. But now that he knew, Steve had to bite down on the urge to ask Tony what his favorite was and how would he feel about Steve making it again. “How long have you… you know, know?”

“I don’t know. A while? At least since that time Natasha choose to spike me coffee with vodka. Not a fan of the flavor, but it woke me up real quick.”

Steve chuckled. Yeah, that one would do it. “I guess that means we should tell the team.”

“And subject myself to something worse?” Tony gasped. “Steven Grant Rogers, don’t you dare.”


End file.
